Charts Read by Fortuneteller
“Bye! Good luck with the ‘stop smoking’ campaign.”
Catch of the Day
Suture Self
Pet Imaging
Stuff They Never Taught You in Medical School
Insurance Hell
Organ Exchange Bank
Gross anatomy/Not so bad anatomy
“Bone loss? You’ve come to the right place.”
“One minute they’re in a nicotine deprivation experiment. Next minute they’re gone.”
“Oh, great. He brought along his office ‘staph’ infection.”
“You call yourself a laboratory retriever? That’s a prescription pad, not a chem panel.”
“I’ll be the doctor and you be from managed care.”
Group Insurance
“You really want laser surgery on your one good eye?”
Early Detection
Will look up famous people who have what you have
“Have all the seats been taken?”
"Something for motion sickness?"
“Rob and I are compatible in every way. Even our bone marrow matches.”
“We better change that sign.”
“Shh. He’s undergoing tweetment.”
Chicken Soup
“I am Ignacio. I’ll be your guide.”
“Are you SURE they meant this place for medical records?”
“We’re a pharmaceutical company. We should be getting ‘pharm’ subsidies.”
Specialist Directory: Cardiology, Dermatology, Hematology, Leeches
Medical Arts Building
Last Person Trying to Get Free Medical Advice for 100 Miles
“What do you mean, ‘paper or plastic’? Have you ever used condoms before?”
Packed Red Cells
“The award for best performance by a doctor in a TV interview goes to…”
House Call of the Wild
Self Serve Self Help