“Oh, sorry. Wrong workshop.”
“Wake up! You’re the next interesting speaker.”
“See how quickly he solves problems? We need more like him.”
"We sent you on a fact-finding mission and all you found were two facts?"
“I hate when she drags herself to work. Am I supposed to feel guilty?”
“I phoned your reference. She said you always ate your carrots and picked up your toys.”
“They’re embezzling funds again. I can tell by their giggling.”
Bankruptcy Specialists
“Gentlemen, come in! Come in! Let me take your company.”
Odds on company future
“Welcome to our little suing circle.”
“They took away our offices. That’s why we have eight meetings a day.”
Business Art Graph
“You’ll fit right in. You have a great sense of rumor.”
“Don’t sit there. Everyone who’s ever sat there has died of boredom.”
“Not the glass ceiling again.”
“I’ll now show the doodle from the last meeting.”
“Make it funny.”
“We frown on nepotism.”
“Here’s Ed, problem solver extraordinaire and inventor of ‘rock, paper, scissors’.”
Indictment of the Month
“Day 431: I finally caught a glimpse of the elusive scapegoat.”
“We can’t take breaks, but lunch is provided.”
“For your holiday bonus you get a whack at the company’s piñata.”
Micro managed to death
“Don’t ask.”
“He has none of the seven habits of highly effective people.”
“Nothing’s gone wrong in the last hour. That can’t be right.”
“How am I going to build my own selfish empire if I continue to work here?”