“They took away our offices. That’s why we have eight meetings a day.”
“I hate when she drags herself to work. Am I supposed to feel guilty?”
“I phoned your reference. She said you always ate your carrots and picked up your toys.”
"We sent you on a fact-finding mission and all you found were two facts?"
“Welcome to our little suing circle.”
“See how quickly he solves problems? We need more like him.”
“Gentlemen, come in! Come in! Let me take your company.”
“Not the glass ceiling again.”
“You’ll fit right in. You have a great sense of rumor.”
“Here’s Ed, problem solver extraordinaire and inventor of ‘rock, paper, scissors’.”
Business Art Graph
Odds on company future
“We frown on nepotism.”
“Don’t sit there. Everyone who’s ever sat there has died of boredom.”
“I’ll now show the doodle from the last meeting.”
“They’re embezzling funds again. I can tell by their giggling.”
Indictment of the Month
Bankruptcy Specialists
“Make it funny.”
“Day 431: I finally caught a glimpse of the elusive scapegoat.”
“Wake up! You’re the next interesting speaker.”
“Oh, sorry. Wrong workshop.”
“Don’t ask.”
“How am I going to build my own selfish empire if I continue to work here?”
“He has none of the seven habits of highly effective people.”
Micro managed to death
“Nothing’s gone wrong in the last hour. That can’t be right.”
“We can’t take breaks, but lunch is provided.”
Businessmen buy capes from booth "Be 5 Again".
“For your holiday bonus you get a whack at the company’s piñata.”