“Wake up! The breakfast meeting will now come to order.”
“I love what you’ve done with the place.”
“I use a shopping bag instead of a briefcase. It reminds me why I even bother coming to work.”
“Don’t be shy. We’re real casual around here.”
“It’s not a crisis. It’s an incomplete success.”
“Sir, you know the rules. No fanny packs.”
“Since we’re merging with another company, all your cubicles will become tetrahedrons.”
“Of course, I’m only distantly related.”
Thank you for not calling me DUDE!”
“The ‘duhs’ have it.”
“I love our new empowerment management theory.”
“This isn’t the big city anymore, Jim. I’m the facilitator now.”
Firing by Heather
“Go on. It’s just a formality.”
“You can yourself a full-service broker? Where are the lattés?”
“Daniel kept taking more and more work home with him everyday.”
“May I help you, Judy Brown, class of ’82, second cousin to Jim Hale and owner of a cat named Ollie?”
“As long as we’re merging with another company... thingey.”
“Do you really need pyrotechnics to make a merger work?”
"You snored through the whole motivational seminar."
“That’s my brother-in-law. He can work his way up.”
“Higher.”
“You better send in ‘cheerleading’.”
“I didn’t know they could foreclose even on a cubicle.”
“It’s crazy here. They’re all on recreational rugs.”
“And the award for Best Product Placement in a Domestic or Foreign Film goes to…”
“I heard rumors we were merging with a killer company.”
“I always wanted to work with animals.”
“Sir, six people are out with the flu. And nine others have ‘blackberry thumbs’.”
“He’s got whistleblower written all over him.”